answersss

Q.How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?
A. Concrete floors are very hard to crack! (UPSC Topper)

Q.If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall, how long would it
take four men to build it?
A. No time at all it is already built. (UPSC 23 rd Rank Opted for IFS)

Q.If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four
apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have?
A. Very large hands.(Good one) (UPSC 11 Rank Opted for IPS)

Q. How can you lift an elephant with one hand?
A. It is not a problem, since you will never find an elephant with
one hand. (UPSC Rank 14 Opted for IES)

Q. How can a man go eight days without sleep?
A. No Probs, He sleeps at night. (UPSC IAS Rank 98)

Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become?
A. It will Wet or Sink as simple as that. (UPSC IAS Rank 2)

Q. What looks like half apple?
A : The other half. (UPSC - IAS Topper )

Q. What can you never eat for breakfast?
A : Dinner.

Q. What happened when wheel was invented?
A : It caused a revolution.

Q. Bay of Bengal is in which state?
A : Liquid (UPSC 33 R ank )

Interviewer said "I shall either ask you ten easy questions or one
really difficult question.

Think well before you make up your mind!" The boy thought for a
while and said,
"my choice is one really difficult question."

"Well, good luck to you, you have made your own choice! Now tell me this.
"What comes first, Day or Night?"
The boy was jolted in! to reality as his admission depends on the
correctness of his answer, but he thought for a while and said, "It's the
DAY sir!"

"How" the interviewer asked,

"Sorry sir, you promised me that you will not ask me a SECOND
difficult question!"

some sucidal pjs

Shivji aur parvatiji computer kyon nahi seekh paye....??
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kyonki
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ganeshji mouse leke bhag jate the.....






how do u make a cocacola frm water in ur house........
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u put the water in a bottle.............
u put in the fridge..........
wht u get is pani which is "THANDA"

nd THANDA matlab.........
u're samrt guys..........






hippopotomus jhooth kyun nahin bolte?????






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bcoz "hips dont lie"...shakira..





An Elephant meets an Ant!!

On Introduction:

Ant : Haathi tumhari umar kitni hai?
Elephant: Paanch Saal !!!


Ant : Paanch Saal aur itnay bade !!!
Elephant: I AM A COMPLAN BOY .


Elephant: Cheetti tumhari umar kitni hai ?
Ant: Tees Saal.


Elephant: Tees Saal aur itni chhoti.

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Ant: Haan ....
I AM A SANTOOR GIRL.... MERI TWACHA SEY MERI UMAR KA PATA HI NAHI
CHALTA






jailer kaidi se- kal tumhe subah 5 baje faansi di jaayegi.

kaidi starts laughing................




why????????????






he says- main to roj subah 8 baje so ke uthta hoon.




Other than being fruits, what is common between an Apple and an
Orange?

think......
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socho socho
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the answer is ..........
They Both Are Not a Banana !!





wats d volume of d person who has lost his memory???










sochoo







think!!!


























pie r square h!!!!!
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coz he keeps on sayin MAIN "CONE" HOON!!!!!!!!!







why did ramu throw butter from the window???

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Ans : he wanted to see the butter-fly!!!!!!
have a nice weekend,
Siddharth.
"I learned, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it."





Ek Gadha ped par chadha to oopar baithe haathi ne poochha:

Haathi: Tu kyun chadha ?

Gadha: Apple khaane

Haathi: Lekin yeh to Mango tree hai !!
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Gadha: Maloom hai, main apple saath laaya hoon!!

some one liners...[;)]

Judge: Why did you hit your husband with a chair?"
Wife: "I couldn't lift the table."
******
"What did one ghost say to another?"
"Do you believe in people?"
******
My friend has a fine watch dog.
At any suspicious noise he wakes the dog and the dog begins to bark.
******
"Room Service? Can you send up a towel?"
" Please wait someone else is using it."

When I told the doctor about my loss of memory, he made me pay in
advance.
******
"Where did you get those big eyes?"
"They came with the face."
******
I went alone on our honeymoon. My wife had already seen Niagara
Falls .
******
But the psychiatrist really helped me a lot. I would never answer the
phone, because I was afraid. Now I answer it whether it rings or not.
******

It was love at first sight. Then I took a second look !!
******
"Look, guide, here are some lion tracks."
"Good. You see where they go and I'll find out where they came from."
******
"Do you think I"ll lose my looks as I get older?"
"Yes if you're lucky."
******
A modern artist is one who throws paint on canvas, wipes it off with
a cloth and sells the cloth.
******

Has there been any insanity in your family?"
"Yes, doctor. My husband thinks he's the boss."
******
I was thinking of becoming a doctor.
I have the handwriting for it.
******
"My wife doesn't know what she wants."
" You're lucky. My wife does."
******
We have a quiet home life. I don't speak to her and she doesn't speak
to me.
******
"What do use for washing dishes?"
"Oh, I tried many things but found my husband best. "
******

1. A FOOLish man tells a woman to STOP talking, but a WISE man tells her that she looks extremely BEAUTIFUL when her LIPS are CLOSED.

2. One GOOD way to REDUCE Alcohol consumption :
Before Marriage - Drink whenever you are SAD,
After Marriage - Drink whenever you are HAPPY


3. Three FASTEST means of Communication :
1. Tele-Phone
2. Tele-Vision
3. Tell to Woman
Need still FASTER - Tell her NOT to tell ANY ONE.

4. Love your friends not their sisters. Love your sisters not their friends.

5. A man got 2 wishes from GOD. He asked for the Best wine and Best Woman.
Next moment, he had the Best Wine and Mother Teresa next to him.
Moral : BE SPECIFIC

6. Let us be generous like this : Four Ants are moving through a forest.
They see an ELEPHANT coming towards them. Ant 1 says : we should KILL him.
Ant 2 says : No, Let us break his Leg alone. Ant 3 says : No, we will just throw him away from our path.
Ant 4 says : No, we will LEAVE him because he is ALONE and we are FOUR.

7. If you do NOT have a Girl Friend - You are missing SOME thing in your life.
If you HAVE a Girl Friend - You are missing EVERY thing in your life.

8. Question : When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their MISTAKE.
Answer : On their MARRIAGE.

9. When your LIFE is in DARKNESS, PRAY GOD and ask him to free you from Darkness.
Even after you pray, if U R still in Darkness - Please PAY the ELECTRICITY BILL.

10. Why Government do NOT allow a Man to MARRY 2 Women.
Because per Constitution, you can NOT PUNISH TWICE for the same Mistake.

11. "A Ship is always safe at the shore - but that is NOT what it is built for" -

Height of optimism:

Soldier: Sir, we are surrounded!

Major: Excellent! We can attack in any direction now!

Q: What did the Gujju mean when he said, "Maro dikro Dubai gayo?"

A: My son drowned.

Q: Who is more satisfied, a man with a million dollars, or a man with
six children?

A: The man with six children. The man with a million dollars wants more.

Q:Husband: Do you know the meaning of WIFE. It means...Without
Information Fighting Evrytime!

Wife: It could also mean - With Idiot For Ever.

An American report: We crossed chickens with cows.The new breed
simultaneously produces milk, meat and eggs.

Report from France: We crossed flies and bees. The hybrid flies over
the trash fields and produces honey.

Report from India: We crossed a melon with cockroaches. When you cut
this melon, seeds run away by themselves

હું તો માનું છું કે હું છું શાયર

કિન્તુ ડાર્લિંગ કહે છે : લાયર


સ્હેજ અડતાં જ શૉક લાગે છે

લાગણી હોય છે લાઈવવાયર


અર્થનો રોડ છે ખાબડખૂબડ

ને વળી ફ્લૅટ શબ્દનું ટાયર


દૂર સહેજે નહિ તો દાઝી જઈશ

ધૅટ ગર્લ ઈઝ સ્પિટિંગ ફાયર


ફાસ્ટ ફૂડ જેવી ગઝલ વેચું છું

કિન્તુ ક્યાં કોઈ છે અહીંયા બાયર?

Sarfaroshi ki Tamanna (English transliteration)

Sarfaroshi ki tamanna ab hamaare dil mein hai Dekhna hai zor kitna baazu-e-qaatil mein hai Karta nahin kyun doosra kuch baat-cheet Dekhta hun main jise woh chup teri mehfil mein hai Aye shaheed-e-mulk- o-millat main tere oopar nisaar Ab teri himmat ka charcha ghair ki mehfil mein hai Sarfaroshi ki tamanna ab hamaare dil mein hai Waqt aanay dey bata denge tujhe aye aasman Hum abhi se kya batayen kya hamare dil mein hai Khainch kar layee hai sab ko qatl hone ki ummeed Aashiqon ka aaj jumghat koocha-e-qaatil mein hai Sarfaroshi ki tamanna ab hamaare dil mein hai Hai liye hathiyaar dushman taak mein baitha udhar Aur hum taiyyaar hain seena liye apna idhar Khoon se khelenge holi gar vatan muskhil mein hai Sarfaroshi ki tamanna ab hamaare dil mein hai Haath jin mein ho junoon katt te nahi talvaar se Sar jo uth jaate hain voh jhukte nahi lalkaar se Aur bhadkega jo shola-sa humaare dil mein hai Sarfaroshi ki tamanna ab hamaare dil mein hai Hum to ghar se nikle hi the baandhkar sar pe kafan Jaan hatheli par liye lo bhar chale hain ye qadam Zindagi to apni mehmaan maut ki mehfil mein hai Sarfaroshi ki tamanna ab hamaare dil mein hai Yuun khadaa maqtal mein qaatil kah rahaa hai baar baar Kya tamannaa-e-shahaada t bhi kisee ke dil mein hai Dil mein tuufaanon ki toli aur nason mein inqilaab Hosh dushman ke udaa denge humein roko na aaj Duur reh paaye jo humse dam kahaan manzil mein hai Wo jism bhi kya jism hai jismein na ho khoon-e-junoon Toofaanon se kya lade jo kashti-e-saahil mein hai Sarfaroshi ki tamanna ab hamaare dil mein hai. Dekhna hai zor kitna baazuay qaatil mein hai

♥♥♥પ્રેમ એટલે ક......♥♥♥

પ્રેમ એટલે કે સાવ ખુલ્લી આંખોથી થતો મળવાનો વાયદો
સ્વપ્નમાં પળાય એવો કાયદો
પ્રેમ એટલે કે તારા ગાલોના ખાડામાં
ડૂબી જતાં મારાં ચોર્યાસી લાખ વહાણોનો કાફલો !

ક્યારે ય નહીં માણી હોય એવી કોઈ મોસમનો
કલરવ યાદ આવે, એ પ્રેમ છે
દાઢી કરતાં જો લોહી નીકળે, ને ત્યાં જ કોઈ
પાલવ યાદ આવે, એ પ્રેમ છે
પ્રેમ એટલે કે સાવ ઘરનો એક ઓરડો,
ને તોયે આખા ઘરથી અલાયદો…

કાજળ આંજીને તને જોઉં તો તું લાગે
એક છોકરી, ને તે ય શ્યામવરણી
વાદળ આંજીને જોતાં એવું લાગ્યું કે,
મને મૂકી, આકાશને તું પરણી
પ્રેમમાં તો ઝાકળ આંજીને તને જોવાને હોય
અને ફૂલોમાં ભરવાનો હોય છે મુશાયરો !

- મુકુલ ચોકસી

Boy & Girl

Ek ladka apni shadi ke liye,
ladki dekhane gaya !
Wo dono ek room mai baithe &
ladka ladki se baatein karne laga.
Fir kuch der bad ladke ne ladki
se kaha ki tum bhi to kuch pucho.
Is par ladki ne { darte-darte } kaha,
bhayia aap kitne bhai bahan ho ?
Ladka bola - aaj tak to 3 they, par ab
aaj se 4 ho gaye.

************ ********* ********* ********

Boy & Girl in restaurant :
Boy:-I Love u
Girl:-I dont Love u
Boy:- Think again?
Girl:-I told u. No no & no
Boy:-Ok!!! Waiter,bring seperate bills.

Girl:- ok ok....... I Love u too........
(Ha Ha Ha)

SOmething Abt my luckyy number 8

Number 8 represents the planet saturn. This number influences all persons born on the 8th, 17th or 26th of any month. They are talkative and boast at a lot. They cannot keep a secret for long and hence are not confidential. They believe in comforts. They have deep and very intence natures, great strength of individuality, they generally play some important role on life stage, but usually on which is fatalistic, or as the instrument of fate for others. They are handsome, smart, healthy and attractive but well wrapped with carelessness. It is advisable for them that they should not spoil their time in futile talks and curb their habit of carelessness if at all they do so they can be more successful. The lukcy colours for people born under the number 8 are all shades of dark grey, black, dark blue and purple. If number 8 peosons wear dress in light colour they would look awkward and as if there was something wrong with them.

Nature
The number eight people are very emotional. They think deeply about everything they are basically just and upright. They always feel that all should get equal justice. It is observed that they have socialistic leanings. Even if their views are opposed they are very firm about them. This result in enmity with many people. Their sympathetic emotions are very different. They have great love for small children. They spend a lot of time and money for the pleasure and education of children. They do not express clearly their sympathy or others. These people firm about their emotions. Sometimes because of their not expressing their emotions people misunderstand them and find them mysterious. The number eight people are fanatically religious. Their views about their country, religion and politics are very clear. Many a times they behave with stern sense of justice. Even though their mentality is approved by others they find it impracticable. That is why common people do not talk with the number eight people freely.

♥ Fact ♥

" This is india "

§♀♪♫♂♥☻♦♣♠

" woman again "

song from muvee TRAIN

Zindagi Ne Zindagibhar Ghum Diye / Mausam
Movie : The Train - 2007
Music Director : Mithoon
Singer :Mithoon
Lyricists :Sayeed Quadri
Cast: Emraan Hashmi, Geeta Basra, Sayali Bhagat

[Zindagi Ne Zindagi Bhar Gam Diye
Jitne Bhi Mausam Diye Sab Nam Diye] - 3

[Jab Tadapta Hai Kabhi Apna Koi
Khoon Ke Aansoo Rula De Bebasi] - 2

[Jee Ke Phir Karna Kya Mujhko Aisi Zindagi] - 2

Jisne Zakhmon Ko Nahi Marham Diye
[Zindagi Ne Zindagi Bhar Gam Diye
Jitne Bhi Mausam Diye Sab Nam Diye]

Zindagi Ne Zindagi Bhar Gam Diye

[Apne Hi Pesh Aaye Humse Ajnabee
Waqt Ki Saajish Koi Samjha Nahi] - 2

Beiraada Kuch Khatayein Humse Ho Gayi

Raah Mein Patthar Meri Har Dam Diye
Zindagi Ne Zindagi Bhar Gam Diye
Jitne Bhi Mausam Diye Sab Nam Diye

Zindagi Ne Zindagi Bhar Gam Diye

[Ek Mukambal Kashmakash Hai Zindagi
Usne Humse Ki Kabhi Naa Dosti] - 2

Jab Mili Mujhko Aasoo Ke Woh Tohphe De Gayi

[Has Sake Hum Aise Mauke Kam Diye] - 2

Zindagi Ne Zindagi Bhar Gam Diye
Jitne Bhi Mausam Diye Sab Nam Diye

Zindagi Ne Zindagi Bhar Gam Diye